Everything Hard is Blessing Us (been collecting some wisdom, some star-seed. . .)

i still have no camera, and it is making me sad. soon the semster will be over and i will get a new one, i think. in the meantime here are some things that have been affecting me quite a bit; been doing some reading on buddhism & the like & of course poems: books that are quoted from down below: "buddhism for mothers" by sarah napthali, "when things fall apart" by pema chodron, "coming to our senses" by jon kabat-zinn,"ten thousand lives" by ko un, "firekeeper" by pattiann rogers.

happy may!
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"It may be when we no longer know what to do we have come to our real work, and that when we no longer know which way to go, we have begun our real journey."
--wendell berry
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"Accepting the mystery in life, refusing to jump to our usual automatic conclusions, a humble attitude of not-knowing--these are what help us to be open and sensitive in all our interactions."--sarah napthali

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"When you yearn for things that you cannot name and you grieve not knowing the course, be certain that you are growing as all things that grow, and rising towards your higher self."--kahlil gibran
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the "vein of gold" is "the area in which you are most truly yourself and from which your gifts and interests mesh and interact most smoothly and powerfully."
--julia cameron
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poem by Pattiann Rogers::


The Family Is All There Is

Think of those old, enduring connections
found in all flesh--the channeling
wires and threads, vacuoles, granules,
plasma and pods, purple veins, ascending
boles and coral sapwood (sugar-
and light-filled), those common ligaments,
filaments, fibers and canals.

Seminal to all kin also is the open
mouth--in heart urchin and octopus belly,
in catfish, moonfish, forest lily,
and rugosa rose, in thirsty magpie,
wailing cat cub, barker, yodeler,
yawning coati.

And there is a pervasive clasping
common to the clan--the hard nails
of lichen and ivy sucker
on the church wall, the bean tendril
and the taproot, the bolted coupling
of crane flies, the hold of the shearwater
on its morning squid, guanine
to cytosine, adenine to thymine,
fingers around fingers, the grip
of the voice on presence, the grasp
of the self on place.

Remember the same hair on pygmy
dormouse and yellow-necked caterpillar,
covering red baboon, thistle seed
and willow herb? Remember the similar
snorts of warthog, walrus, male moose
and sumo wrestler? Remember the familiar
whinny and shimmer found in river birches,
bay mares and bullfrog tadpoles,
in children playing at shoulder tag
on a summer lawn?

The family--weavers, reachers, winders
and connivers, pumpers, runners, air
and bubble riders, rock-sitters, wave-gliders,
wire-wobblers, soothers, flagellators--all
brothers, sisters, all there is.

Name something else.


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(paraphrased) from pema chodron's book When Things Fall Apart,
here are Three Methods to Deal With Chaos & Difficulty:::

1. no more struggle:::::::meditate; relax as is; accept; work with the monster in your mind; say "hi demons it's wonderful you demons came!"

2. poison as medecine:::::::use difficult situations as fuel for waking up; feel the bad things, breathe them in, breathe in others' pain as well, and let it out on exhale; tonglen meditation (take your hurt and turn it to love)

3. regard what arises as sacred, a manifestation of wisdom::::::world is sacred; instead of looking for something else, work with what is
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poem by Ko Un:

Hui-ja

With hands still wet from washing dishes, she goes out
to the black alder grove, and cries to her heart's
content until

her dead mother's face appears. Star-seed sprinkled in the
sky, stars appear.

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